Don’t Forget Empathy
“Empathy is not optional,” Annunzio says. “You cannot be a good leader without it. Empathy can be a natural skill or a learned skill.”
Participants in Annunzio’s program practice having difficult conversations with employees and team members, which she records on video. Her formula for those conversations always starts with showing empathy. When people forget the empathy step, the conversation often goes awry, becoming tense or even combative.
“When they redo it with empathy, the other person relaxes,” Annunzio says. “They calm down. They get into their game.”
Tim Moormeier, president of U.S. Engineering, a construction holding company based in Kansas City, Missouri, took Annunzio’s program as part of the Advanced Management Program as well, and then subsequently hired her to consult with his company.
In his role, he mentors four presidents and two executives, and says he has difficult conversations frequently, particularly when an employee’s performance doesn’t meet expectations. He says Annunzio’s guidance has helped him set up a structure to have regular communication with employees with the goal of helping them analyze mistakes and take steps toward success.
“The only way to do that in an effective way is to show that you care,” he says. “When you give feedback to someone, you have to be very careful to only criticize the behavior and not the person.”